honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
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