I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
My boyfriend texted me as I was texting some random hookup from last night. His text: "Morning baby" My response: "Your cum is in my hair"
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
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