fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
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