i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize
