I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
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