im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
Randomize
