How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
why the fuck is there hamburger meat in the toaster. i repeat: WHY THE FUCK IS THERE HAMBURGER MEAT IN MY NEW TOASTER
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
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