hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
Having your wife answer your cell was so lame. Maybe we can talk when you get your phone, your facebook account, and your balls back.
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
The kids I taught this morning even knew i was drunk. One of them even said, and I quote, "You smell like my dad after he goes bowling."
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
Volunteering at a homeless shelter a bum asked if he could lick me cause I still reeked of whiskey. Being a bumsickle=epic hangover
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
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