We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
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