Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
You know you're stoned when you tell your dog you're stoned only to realise he's not in the pickup
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
