I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
Randomize
