yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
Randomize
