the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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