you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
FYI you are now my emergency contact at plan parenthood
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
Randomize
