Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
i was hoping the water fountain would somehow shoot out vodka this morning
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
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