i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
I am in the checkout line at the dollar store and there is a guy in front of me holding a pregnancy test, a chocolate bar, and fake roses. Champion.
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
It's blow job season.
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
How have I seen you throw up on yourself 3 different times, yet we weren't Facebook friends until I accidentally hooked up with your ex?
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
Randomize
