He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
Randomize
