I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
Randomize