I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
Randomize