Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
Randomize
