Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
He came to the party late, didn't bring tacos, and then asked what shennanigans we were getting into. I swear I will never fuck another hipster.
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
