he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
Randomize
