whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize
