That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
Randomize
