We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
You can bone my sister, but I will end our friendship if you write 'LOLERS' one more time at the end of your texts.
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
Randomize
