what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Randomize
