me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
Currently at a bar observing the mating patterns of drunken people in their 60s. This is hilariously terrifying. Hope he has Viagra.
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
Randomize