I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
Of course I have a pirate flag
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
Randomize
