just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
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