I failed the drunk obstacle course of trying to find my bed... consolation prize... a sore ankle and "disappointed' parents.
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
