I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
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