his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
are you just going to ignore any texts involving my penis from now on? because thats going to shut down a pretty sizeable portion of our conversations.
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
Randomize
