i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
Remember that St. Patrick's Day when I fucked your married coworker in his truck and the whole bar was chanting for you "Don't fuck Mike"?! #TheLuckOfTheIrish 🍀
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
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