he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
Do you think I could convince a doctor that my uterus is poisoning me? It wouldn't technically be a lie. It does more harm than good.
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
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