k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
She took all the bottles out of the shower caddy and replaced them with booze. I just made a shower Manhatten. Imma marry this one.
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
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