He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
Either I'm drunk or judge Judy has 3D commercials...so I think I'm drunk. Also I may or may not haven eaten a hoagie on the toilet when I didn't want to stand up
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
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