well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
One of my interns found me on Grindr. I'm really gonna make him earn the absurd amount of money I pay him.
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
Randomize
