Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
my roomates packed me a lunch. it had bread, cheesewiz, a can of refried beans and a condom with a note that said "good luck on your first day". im not even gonna pretend to be mad.
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
He better not be in your backpack
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
