The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
pretty sure 5 days for a bachelor party in Vegas is too long when even the stripper giving me a lapdance says "wow that's a long time!"
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
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