i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
It’s bad enough my brother slept with half of the sorority this year, but now he’s lifeguarding at the club and every divorcée and cougar in town is asking me for his number. My twin is a manwhore and I’ve become his pimp.
Randomize
