member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
I may have passed out and puked all over the host's favorite couch, but three hours and a rip later, I was eating tiramisu in the bathtub with the birthday boy and a hot Italian.
Randomize
