just took a cab, driver just asked what i'd been drinking- i said vodka, he said "can't do vodka-drunk, it makes me feel like i'm giving birth to myself" ...no comment
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
just found out I caught the bouquet at the wedding. I win for being the drunkest yet most functional bridesmaid.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
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