You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
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