so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
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