i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize
