I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
Randomize
