He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
She told me I should be a condom model.
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
Randomize
