WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
She bit a glass in half.
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
Randomize
