you said the mailboxes were turning into babies and they started crawling away. then you cried and asked me how you were gonna get your college acceptance letters
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.
You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
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