Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
Randomize
