Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
Randomize
