Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
Whenever you feel bad about your life, just remember the time I tried to swim while high and thought for a minute I was genuinely drowning
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
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